I Hate the Phone!!!

Many times I've read articles concerning which pieces of technology have had the most significant impact on the world. Usually at or near the top you'll find the telephone. Personaly I hate the phone. I hate it like I hate commercials.

I think the telephone is the most intrusive piece of technology we have. Here's something whose main purpose is to interupt you and demand your immediate attention with absolutely no regard of what you might be doing. That's right it is a remote interupting machine! I say fuck the phone. Some days if it's ringing too much I just turn the phone right off. It doesn't have to be telemarketers or anything like that, it could just as easily be my best friend calling.

The point is, I decide when I want to waste my time gabbing to somebody, not the telephone. If I want to be on the phone I will call you. I'm not some animal that's trained to jump at the phones bidding. It's time to take the power back. Why is it that people think that if the phone is ringing that you are obligated to answer it? Fuck that! I take it as a suggestion. Kind of like, "Hey! So-and-so is calling, if you have nothing better to do you could pick it up. If not, I understand. You're a busy guy." I bet that 95% of the time when the phone rings I turn the ringer off rather than answer the call. The nerve of some people! Calling up out of the blue all unannounced, like I have nothing better to do than talk on the stupid phone.

And if you're calling from a number that I don't recognize or is displayed as an Unknown Name & Number, you don't have a hope in Hell of getting me to pick it up. I rarely want to talk to the people I DO know let alone people I don't know.

Last weekend my friend Muskslayer called. I knew what he was calling about. It was nothing time sensitive or anything. He just wanted to confirm that we were going fishing the next day. I had just walked in the front door after getting home from work, and I was looking forward to relaxing a bit since it was now the weekend. I was not quite ready to get on the phone yet. So, 'click' off goes the ringer. Then he called back 2 minutes later. Again no answer. Immediately after this he called my cell phone. Now it's becoming a battle of wills. Every call is only decreasing the chance that I will answer. In the end he called about 8 times in the span of an hour and then gave up. Or so it seemed. He called one more time about half an hour later. At this point I was determined to make him wait all night because, frankly, his persistence was becoming annoying and bordering on nagging.

Not five minutes later he walks in my door saying, "Phone's Broken!"

I thought I had problems with phone calls. At least I only have issues with incoming calls. I'd really hate the phone if I felt compelled to drive across town to investigate whenever someone didn't answer their phone. Now that's what I call a major inconvenience!