Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Day One Results

I didn't smoke any weed since quitting. Having said that, I feel like shit.

I noticed a weird thing yesterday. I can't really explain it, but I kept thinking I was about to smoke some dope. I don't mean I was going to break down and start puffing away. It was more as if I'd made the decision to smoke up like normal but just had a couple of things to do first (Ex: "I'm going to get this chore taken care of and then I'm going upstairs to get high"). So I was constantly thinking the big reward was coming when it wasn't.

If you could hear my thoughts yesterday they would have went something like, "WEEED! WEEEED! WEEED! POTTT! POTTT! WEEED! WEED!"

I did manage to keep myself busy and I think that is really the most important thing to do.

At around 9:30pm I noticed that I was hot and sporting a bit of a glow. In fact I was really hot and felt like my glow was about to burst into a sweat storm. Is this normal?

I went to bed shortly after 10:00pm and read a bit of "Moby Dick" (note to self: write an entry about reading Moby Dick). Just before 11:00pm I turned out the light to go to sleep. WRONG! I just laid in bed, feeling cold when not covered and feeling hot when covered, thinking, 'weed weed weed weed weed weed weed...'

At around 1:00am I turned the light back on and read another chapter of M.D. and turned the light out again. The rest of the night I spent flopping around in the bed like a fish out of water, sweating like a pig. Sometime after 2:00am I got some sleep. Not good sleep by any means. I kept waking up over and over again and had dreams about not being able to sleep (how fun is that?).

6:30am arrived far too early this morning. I felt like total shit when I got up. I also had a little nausea to go with my fatigue just for fun. I got myself together and dragged my ass to work. So here I sit. I don't feel sick at all and my temperature feels fairly normal. How's the mind doing?

'weed weed weed weed weed weed weed weed weed...'

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